I didn’t write about Transgender Day of Visibility this year on the day it happened. I couldn’t. It was too difficult to process how I felt. There are bad things and good things about TDoV that I want to express.
First the bad…
I am angry that we need to have this day. I am angry that there is so much aggressive hatred hurled toward me as a person by politicians, TERFs, gender criticalists, and other bigots. People that don’t know me, but clearly want me to suffer and likely, die.
I am fed up with all the bullshit that gets thrown around about transgender folks. The ignorant, bigoted, hateful bullshit that, unless I deliberately tune out the world, I hear or read about every single day.
Try to imagine living your life where half of the political spectrum is trying to legislate you out of existence. Where they continuously call you deranged, delusional, unnatural, and predatory.
It’s all so tiring. It takes it’s toll. It wears you down. For some, it’s too much, and they seek the ultimate way out.
And those hateful assholes often don’t want to wait around to see if you are suicidal, they just kill you. And they get away with it because cops don’t care, and if they do get caught, they just plead “trans panic”, and get set free.
So yeah. Not the best reason to be visible, is it?
And now the good…
On the other hand, visibility is how we become accepted as normal. Showing us in media (on tv and in films) lets the public see us. But that visibility is only truly useful if we aren’t being mocked at the time. Still, seeing any representation is a good thing.
Plus with the internet, we now have community, and the ability to find out about ourselves and each other. Which means we know we aren’t alone or freaks of nature. That kind of visibility saves lives.
So to sum up, I have a lot of mixed feelings about TDoV this year. It took too much time to process them to get it out on the day I should have. (And there was no way I was publishing something on April Fool’s Day!)
I’m proud to be who I am. It took me a long time to understand and recognize who and what I was. I am a transgender woman, and I am visible!